How do we raise our boys to be ''men'' and what do they lose in the process? This book examines this question and many more. Can a boy be contaminated by his mother's femininity? What if he's not '...


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The Courage To Raise Good Men

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The Courage To Raise Good Men << Prev page
Olga Silverstein, Beth Rashbaum

With the insight and ideas THE COURAGE TO RAISE GOOD MEN has to offer, it is not only a potentially life changing book, but it's a steal. The book questions our traditional notions of manhood and beckons both mothers and fathers to refuse to sanction the emotional shutdown we traditionally demand of our boys. In doing so, we will enable our sons to grow up to be not only strong men, but whole people.

Our culture's insistence that a mother and son eventually break their bond is one that even the most "enlightened" parents accept as appropriate and healthy. Our questioning of how to raise our boys to be men, our quiet resignation over what they lose in the process, our ponderings over whether a boy can be contaminated by his mother's femininity are all discussed lucidly in this book. I guarantee that you will digest what it has to say passionately, for this is rather new ground.

Written by a mother who is a founding member of the family therapy movement, it is an eloquent and rallying challenge to the cultural conventions governing mothers and sons. In the process of doing the traditional raising of boys to achieve and girls to relate, men are left with mixed messages and mothers are guiltily afraid to communicate their love. Our traditional attempts to cut the cord and make a boy a man result in damage. As a therapist, she has run into the same theme over and over again: Son: "Where were you when I needed you?" Mother: "Trying to help you become a man." In the process, men had lost touch not just with their mothers, but with parts of themselves as well.

This provocative book is not just another call for women to return to the old order, in which they were the arbiters of family life. In fact, they never have been the arbiters of family life, the creators of family values. They were and are the agents of the system they live in, dedicated to creating the kind of men who it was thought would serve that system well. Now they must become agents of their own values, drawing up their own agendas. To do this does not mean trying to turn the clock back to some imaginary idyllic time when men went out into the world and women stayed home with the children; it means committing oneself to the idea of a world in which gender does not separate people from one another, or from parts of themselves. It means honoring the potential for wholeness in each of them.

Buy this book---and I mean that with all my heart. You'll probably read it a couple of times. Then pass it along, urging that friend to consider what it has to say. It gives us the faith and know-how to begin a new world in which boys are not betrayed into "masculinity" by their mothers' retreat, and men and women keep their birthright of empathy, love and connection.

eBook price $12.99

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